CHAPTER TWO

    So......... when I said I was looking forward to the next chapter in my life, I didn’t mean more health issues …. Bones thinning… maybe….but most definitely, not cancer!!!! WTF?!!!!  So what have I gained from this?  … …I am glad I get those routine mammograms…. But mostly, where the hell did I get these great friends?  People are taking me to the hospital… others want to be there when I talk with the surgeon… others offer healings, love, prayers… some who have been through it already offer whatever advice I need… I would love to tell you that I am so wonderful, that I get great friends as a result… it’s more like… I learned my lesson… Several years ago, I was told some rough stuff… My one cousin and her boyfriend shared more than once that I have an “edge”.  Not a nice edge…Another cousin shared that I am judgmental… What a bitch!!!!  My brothers have opinions that I refuse to write… so I worked hard at this sarcasm and sharp tongue.  I pretty much keep it under control and do my best not to hurt others…. I do very well for a little while, then it comes out… can’t control myself…I laugh at something NOT to be laughed at… I scoff at a sweet story, or I just get pissy… but it’s less than I used to be…. for example.. there was a surprise birthday party thrown for me at work 7 years ago, and the flier said, “Please say Happy Birthday to one of the nicest, funniest people we know.”  …OK… so they didn’t know me that long…..When my mother died.. one of her coworkers came up to me at the funeral and said, “Your mother taught me kindness.  And that’s what you need to learn, kindness.”  So I hit her…. Anyway, I am not as nice as my mom… and I don’t even try… and I am not as good as I would like to be… but…..I love love love my friends and I am definitely blessed…So... if it's cancer that needs to show me how lucky I am.... so be it...