DAY 2

   I will be doing my third day of radiation tomorrow.  I was so exhausted and "spacey", after the first one and the second, I did much better.  I am repeatedly amazed at the compassion of others.  Have I said this before?  I am repeatedly amazed at the compassion of others.  And I am repeatedly outraged at the stupidity of others.  Ya.  With me, your damned if you do and damned if you don't.  I get to the Cleveland Clinic, and it takes two minutes for the treatment and then I come out and the valet parking took way too long.  After fifteen minutes, I ask the girl what the problem is.  Others that came out after me have their cars and drive away,  She is as confused as I am and asks the "men" parking cars what the problem is.  I calm myself down by doing my gratitude's.  That's all I do when I get scared.  And I have gotten scared alot.  "I am grateful my parents aren't around to be upset over this."  That's a biggie.  As much as I miss my parents, the parking of cars threw my father into a rage.  Could that be where I get this attitude?  Nah... not me... And he hated the responsibility of driving places.  I am grateful I can walk.  I am grateful I can take myself to these treatments.  I am grateful I HAVE a car.  Ya.  That's a biggie too.  As I say these gratitude's I see my car.  Works every time.  I breathe as deeply as I can and get my ass home safe and sound.  Not to my old apartment, but to an air conditioned beautiful home.  I just moved here with a friend.  He charges a very reasonable rent for such a beautiful home.  It has one of those circular driveways and I park right in front of the door.  Did I mention I am repeatedly amazed at the compassion of others?